Just try to never grow up.....

Wow.... If you know me, then you know Taylor Swift's music has an amazing impact on my life. I recently bought tickets to take my daughter to see her in Lubbock on October 14th. I can't wait I am so very excited!! To prepare for our mommy daughter trip I bought Taylor's new CD "Speak Now" Driving home I put it on and going through the songs we got to one called "Grow Up" I had to change it until we got home because it was making me cry. The very first lyrics are " Your little hand's wrapped round my finger, and it's so quiet in the world tonight.....You're little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming, so I tuck you in and turn on your favorite night light." Any mom knows that feeling. Holding your sleeping newborn their tiny little fingers wrapped around yours and their eyeslids flutter, they smile and it just instantly melts your heart. This ususally happens in the hospital the first night they're born and you can't put them down because you are so ridiculously amazed and in love with this tiny little person. Another line that really gets to me is "Oh darling don't you ever grow up, just stay this little, oh darling don't you ever grow up it could stay this simple." Last week I registered my princess for Kindergarten. It was honestly one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do. I know it has to happen, and I know it's "not that big of a deal" But to me it is... school elementary and middle was not easy for me. I hated it most of the time, I didn't want to go. I was bullied, teased, made fun of, ridiculed, harrassed. I wasn't one of the "popular" kids and it was so hard to be on the end of their jokes. Without my few friends though the years I honestly don't know if I would've made it. Without Denise, Angie, and Angela at each school I went to I really don't know what I would've done. So for me school is a scary thing to put my daughter in. They handed me a sticker at the end of registration for Brookie, it said "I'm an Official Kindergardener" I took one look at that sticker and I cried. It seems like just yesterday I held her for the first time, laid her on the bed, unwrapped her made sure she had 10 little fingers and 10 little toes. She was absoultely perfect. 6lbs 10oz of pure joy. I'm not gonna lie there are some days, I wanna strangle her or myself, but those days are few and far between. For the most part she is a very well behaved smart little girl. I love her more each day and I love watching her be an amazing big sister to Bryson. She tells me all the time," Momma how'd we get such a cute little baby, we're lucky huh?" I can't help but smile and reply with "yeah baby we are lucky, you can't imagine how lucky mommy is." I pray to God every day to thank him for my many blessings. Including a job that I love, a safe apartment for my family, 2 beautiful healthy loving kids...it goes on and on!! Back to the song...there's a line that says, "Don't loose the way that you danced around in your PJ's getting ready for school" I can not wait to have those moment with my daughter. I'm saddened by how fast she has grown into a beautiful little girl. But I am excited to watch her grow into a amazing young lady, sassy teenager, and ultimatly a remarkable woman raising her own family. For now I'll just listen to this Taylor Swift song, and cry tears that are a mix of saddness, happiness, fear, and excitement. So to my Brooke and my Bryson.... Oh Darlings, don't you ever grow up don't you ever grow up just stay this little, oh darlings don't you ever grow up don't you ever grow up it can stay this simple....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MggNFU0_4Fs

My life as a single mommy never fails to amaze me.... It's not always easy but my Lord.... it's so much fun!